Thoughts on Women's Day..
Ding Dong!
The doorbell rings as I am vegging out in front of the TV and mindlessly scrolling through Facebook posts. I answer it and find our maid Kantamma on the other side. She is back after a hiatus of almost a month. I greet her with a smile.
"Aalat ka! Tumchi mulgi kashi aahe?" (So you're back! How is your daughter?)
She returns the smile with some difficulty. She had had to leave suddenly when she got a call from her daughter's in-laws. Her daughter, who was pregnant, had suddenly started bleeding in the 7th month. When Kantamma reached her daughter's place, she had delivered a pre-term baby, which only weighed 1.5 kgs.
"Mulgi bari aahe madam, pan bal gela." (Daughter is alright, but the child died.)
There are no tears in her eyes as she says this. They had dried by now. As I knew she would, she tells me some of the details of what happened, as best as she can. They were just told that baby needs NICU care and was in the hospital for 15 days, following which the baby died.
"1.5 lakhs kharcha zala madam. Bal pan gela ani paise pan" (I spent 1.5 lakhs. We lost the money as well as the baby).
I offer some words of comfort, however inadequate. She then tells me as to how the daughter's in-laws spent only 25k and the rest of the cost had to be borne by her. On the day her daughter was discharged, supposedly all the banks were closed and she had to borrow money from a lot of people.
"Pan mi pai an pai parat keli" (I have returned every single rupee), says she.
"Paise kai kadhihi kamvta yetat, pan lokanchi bolni nahi aikaichi" (Money can be earned any time, but I don't want to endure people's taunts). She says she has even told her daughter's mother-in-law that she is only going to send her daughter back after she regains her strength. And when she does send her daughter back, she is going to return the 25k spent by her in-laws on her daughter, as she doesn't want her daughter to be abused at her in-laws place. She also made her daughter get all the gold given to her (which was approximately 45g) as a part of her dowry, so that her mother-in-law wouldn't sell it off.
I bet many of us have come across similar stories. As I posted the customary 'happy women's day' message on Facebook this morning, I wondered (even though it was just for an instant), as to why we should make a fuss on Women's Day. And now I have my answer. It is because of women like Kantamma. She did not hesitate even one bit while spending all that money on her daughter. While Kantamma's daughter is lucky to have support from her parents, this is not true in many cases. When is this mentality going to change? Why are daughter-in-laws treated as a burden?
The doorbell rings as I am vegging out in front of the TV and mindlessly scrolling through Facebook posts. I answer it and find our maid Kantamma on the other side. She is back after a hiatus of almost a month. I greet her with a smile.
"Aalat ka! Tumchi mulgi kashi aahe?" (So you're back! How is your daughter?)
She returns the smile with some difficulty. She had had to leave suddenly when she got a call from her daughter's in-laws. Her daughter, who was pregnant, had suddenly started bleeding in the 7th month. When Kantamma reached her daughter's place, she had delivered a pre-term baby, which only weighed 1.5 kgs.
"Mulgi bari aahe madam, pan bal gela." (Daughter is alright, but the child died.)
There are no tears in her eyes as she says this. They had dried by now. As I knew she would, she tells me some of the details of what happened, as best as she can. They were just told that baby needs NICU care and was in the hospital for 15 days, following which the baby died.
"1.5 lakhs kharcha zala madam. Bal pan gela ani paise pan" (I spent 1.5 lakhs. We lost the money as well as the baby).
I offer some words of comfort, however inadequate. She then tells me as to how the daughter's in-laws spent only 25k and the rest of the cost had to be borne by her. On the day her daughter was discharged, supposedly all the banks were closed and she had to borrow money from a lot of people.
"Pan mi pai an pai parat keli" (I have returned every single rupee), says she.
"Paise kai kadhihi kamvta yetat, pan lokanchi bolni nahi aikaichi" (Money can be earned any time, but I don't want to endure people's taunts). She says she has even told her daughter's mother-in-law that she is only going to send her daughter back after she regains her strength. And when she does send her daughter back, she is going to return the 25k spent by her in-laws on her daughter, as she doesn't want her daughter to be abused at her in-laws place. She also made her daughter get all the gold given to her (which was approximately 45g) as a part of her dowry, so that her mother-in-law wouldn't sell it off.
I bet many of us have come across similar stories. As I posted the customary 'happy women's day' message on Facebook this morning, I wondered (even though it was just for an instant), as to why we should make a fuss on Women's Day. And now I have my answer. It is because of women like Kantamma. She did not hesitate even one bit while spending all that money on her daughter. While Kantamma's daughter is lucky to have support from her parents, this is not true in many cases. When is this mentality going to change? Why are daughter-in-laws treated as a burden?
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